Spray a non stick pan with olive oil spray and cook onion for 4-5 minutes over medium-low heat until the onion gets kind of caramelized, and in garlic and cook for an additional minute. Dump that into a bowl and fold in the crabmeat, bread crumbs, mayonnaise, egg white, lemon juice, 1/2 tsp of salt, old bay, and cilantro, mixing just until well blended, being careful not to break up the lump crab too much.
Shape the mixture into 4 fat crab cakes. Sprinkle with a little more salt and put them on a plate, cover, and stick them in the refrigerator to chill for at least an hour.
To cook, heat butter and olive oil in a non stick pan over medium heat. Add the crab cakes - two at a time, if you want, so you can flip easily - and cook for about 4 minutes each side until nice and crisp. Be careful flipping, as they can fall apart, but they will be delicious even if they do!
Serve with lots of fresh lemon juice. YUM!